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Matti's story.....

Hi I'm Matti and I'm Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub's Media and Marketing Coordinator! 

I want to share a few thoughts with you to mark this year's Mental Health Awareness Week, which has the theme of "Movement: Moving More for Mental Health". I've found that being more active through volunteering at Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub has helped me to feel less anxious and less socially isolated. 

Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub is located in the heart of Lincoln City Centre, at 12 Mint Lane. The building has been run by Involve Lincoln Ltd for the benefit of the local community since September 2020, when they purchased the building from the County Council. I’ve been involved with Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub since last year.

Social Anxiety and Me: 

I've experienced Social Anxiety throughout my life and it can be very difficult to live with at times. Social anxiety for me includes experiencing intense feelings of fear in busy social situations, like being on public transport during rush hour and hypervigilance, (being on guard for anyone who I think might threaten my personal safety) in those situations.

It goes beyond feeling just shy: in fact I’m often worried at times about not getting my words out properly or phrasing things wrongly, even when people tell me I'm well spoken. Social anxiety can feel like an inner voice censoring you in order to defend you from perceived danger which more often than not isn’t there. It's very draining emotionally. 

I have also experienced quite embarrassing physical symptoms of social anxiety like excessive sweating, involuntary lips pursing or trembling, even when reading in public and a very dry mouth. The physical symptoms often make me more visible in busy social situations which can increase my anxious thoughts and feelings and intensify the physical symptoms further.

So yes, social anxiety has been with me for many years. When I was younger I found it difficult to make lasting friendships that went beyond the school gates, mainly because of the specialist physiotherapy support I needed at school due to me having dyspraxia. 

I would worry about being judged for how I look, how I talk, how I walk, even for my academic abilities. I became a perfectionist because, to put it bluntly, I was worried that I would be judged negatively for being "different" and then experience harassment and discrimination as a result.

I have experienced and continue to experience harassment, mainly name-calling and stares, including when walking alone on the streets of Lincoln. In fact as a trans, dyspraxic woman I have been shouted at and been told I don’t belong here by complete strangers. That has further exacerbated my anxious thoughts and feelings. Nobody should be made to feel uncomfortable on the streets, regardless of their gender, sexual orientation or whether they have a disability or not. 

I became very guarded over the years. There were fewer opportunities for me to go out, especially after I graduated from the University of York. I increasingly turned to shopping on my own to get me out of the house when not at work. The rest of the time I often felt isolated and lonely.

Social Anxiety in the UK and Lincolnshire: 

Social anxiety is more common than you might think. Around 12% of people are estimated to be experiencing social anxiety globally and it is considered to be “the most persistent of anxiety disorders” (https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg159/documents/social-anxiety-disorder-final-scope2).

Although there are no specific figures to show how many people in Lincolnshire are experiencing social anxiety, "the estimated prevalence of common mental health conditions (which includes social anxiety) among aged 16 and over is 15.8%" and ¼ of people across Lincolnshire have reported a high anxiety score (https://lhih.org.uk/jsna/live-well/mental-health-emotional-wellbeing/).

Volunteering at Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub Helped Reduce My Social Anxiety Levels: 

When I first came to Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub in May last year I was just coming out of a period of experiencing a very high level of social anxiety following the end of the COVID-19 pandemic.  I had been staying at home the entire time, not feeling up to going out for nature walks or even going out to visit my favourite shops. I was worried about what the future held for me.

I was invited to come and help volunteer in Mint Lane Cafe on a Tuesday morning, initially helping to sort out the donations made to the Cafe by Fareshare Midlands, local farmers and local residents. It felt great being able to help the local community, moving about to and from the Cafe and seeing the donated produce being used to make healthy, nutritious meals that are enjoyed by so many customers.

I began feeling less worried about being judged and was judging myself a bit less. I enjoyed having conversations with fellow volunteers about life in Lincoln and beyond. In short, getting involved in volunteering helped me to feel just that little bit less socially anxious. 

Now that I'm Mint Lane Wellbeing Hub's Media and Marketing Coordinator I'm helping to develop projects which will help others in the local area who are experiencing anxiety including a peer support group. Please look out for future blog posts for more info!

Overall I'm feeling more resilient and I'm more hopeful for my future, personally and professionally. I've promised myself I'm not going to let my social anxiety stop me from achieving what I want to achieve in life.

If I could give advice to anyone else experiencing social anxiety it would be to reach out if you can: there is always someone who will be willing to listen to you and ensure your voice is heard. Nobody should feel that they have to be alone because of who they are. 

If anyone in Lincoln has any project ideas that aim to improve mental health and emotional well-being of people living in the city and surrounding areas, please get in touch at mattiatmlwh@gmail.com